I’m having a really hard time adjusting to this “default-world” that you hear Burners talk about. What a flipping default world it is. That phrase holds so much meaning and makes me laugh out loud now. And as I transition myself from an existence where people hug, connect, love, kiss, share infinite time, help each other, share truths, and fly by their intuition, into this “default reality” of schedules and work and kids and sports and “to-do’s” really has this recovering Type-A annoyed.
And I have an AMAZING life with EPIC changes coming up that I am so excited about! And in this moment, still, I am annoyed. Guess I’m still struggling with “embracing it all."
Not to mention that I left my heart on the Playa …. Literally. Left it, exposed as it’s ever been. Ever. I’ve never loved in a moment as I did that sunrise on the Playa. Shiva-Shakti in all it’s glorious balance. I am so grateful to be reminded about my manifesting skills. My heart is still raw and open to what was to be, or not to be. I don’t know, but I must trust. All the stars say I must trust, so I do; without worrying, planning, scheming, or unconsciously manifesting.
I want to write about exposure, the theme for the week, however, I must write about it all. Yes, all of it.
I must touch on the Divine timing of all of this. The New Moon in Virgo, asking for organization and Jupiter, wanting to create a bigger container than we may be comfortable with, because it’s not ALL pretty.
The Solar and Lunar Eclipses coming up that will give us all a portal for expansion, endings, and beginnings. The way we are all manifesting at such a rapid rate that it’s IMPERATIVE that we are awake to our truth. The fact that nothing is more important right now than your spiritual practice and plugging into what connects you to Source. And to the unwavering FAITH and TRUST that is necessary right now in this crazy, mystical shit storm that is re-aligning us with our truth and deepest desires.
Because the truth is the Universe is asking us ALL to expand beyond what we can intellectually believe we can achieve. We must all drop deeply into our intuition and be free from the constraints of what “makes sense”. And maybe that means pulling the plug for some, and maybe it means just changing the way you do things by 5 degrees each day.
I must remember that "Just as any creative project begins with a blank slate, your life as a creative project will unfold in it's right timing with power and purpose as long as you practice unwavering Faith and Trust every step of the way" .. Thank you Virgo Magic for this lovely reminder.
I have a lot to say honestly, and I think that I want to preface it all by saying that every single person on that Playa, had a different experience. Because I think Burning Man is a vortex of individual experiences that are necessary for the evolution of each participant. If they’re open to it.
So while I write my own, personal, raw, vulnerable musings, please hold your tongue and your judgments, and just sit with one person’s experience. Because if we “Burners” sit long enough, we will all see what we are meant to learn individually and how that ripples into the collective. So that’s all I’m doing here
When I first was offered the opportunity to attend Burning Man, all I could think about was how great it would be to “get it off my bucket list”. And to be able to teach yoga at the base of The Woman is quite an honor for this Midwest Yogini. “I just need to go once”, were my words I think.
But you know what, Burning Man will never get crossed off my bucket list. Burning Man is now part of me, something I will never be able to give up, cross off, or forget. Burning Man is a love, a conquest, a reboot, a complete recalibration of my soul. A reminder of who I am at my deepest level and each experience is personal, unique, and potent. Now I see why so many people flock. It’s what we all crave whether we want to admit it or not.
We all want to expose ourselves from our most primal place. We all want to dance in the dust, wear little or no clothing, love each other, and do what we want, when we want. We all want to be able to honestly let go of our grip … on everything. We all want to embrace our insecurities and love them. None of us enjoys being on a timeline, a deadline, or ruled by time at all. But a sweet friend said to me while I was there….“Time is a just a grid on the Playa. It’s just a place where you live.”
Everyone wants to believe in magical encounters, in destined love, in a tribe, in their intuition, in their ability to be alone. Everyone wants to be transparent, authentic, and to feel intimate connection with another soul. Everyone wants to wander.
No one wants to be tethered to their damn phones, no one wants to listen to notification after notification beep on their iPad or computer. And no one wants to compete with another … we have just been conditioned, or “defaulted” to believe that as truth.
I found Burning Man to be one of the most epic adventures of my life thus far. And I’ve had a lot of adventures to be sure. This one exposed my heart, my truth, my fears, my distractions, my primal Goddess in all her forms. My Shakti power at work creating, destroying, and manifesting a life that is so incredible. Burning Man ignited a spark that will burn for quite awhile, amidst the to-do’s of my life with my two kids, this environment of San Fran and the North Bay, the yoga school, my non profit and the gathering of conscious people … I am re-sparked.
I mean really … pretty lovely.
But here’s the deal … if I had to pick one word, just one word to share for this week, it would be exposure. I exposed myself way beyond my comfort zone. I hate camping! Despise it! Can’t stand getting in a tent let alone with an inch of playa dust in it. I can’t stand the cold, hate it. My ideal vacation is lying on the beach, coconut in my hand, getting up in between naps and love-making to jump in the ocean and maybe eat some food.
I exposed myself to not knowing, to harsh elements out of my control, to my fears, to my most uncomfortable places and you know what? I noticed everything about myself and I loved it. I loved the exposure. I loved the innocence, the vulnerability, the noticing. I loved seeing all sides of me and knowing that I am not perfect, nor do I want to be.
But I do want to expose more of myself. I want that feeling on a daily basis. I want to feel primal and in alignment with all that is real. I don’t want to fall into the default world. I want this truth of Burning Man to be a bigger part of the default world. Where people hug, and love, and don’t give a shit what anyone else thinks. Where people see the bigger picture of life and our deepest connection.
Expose yourself just a little bit and you can be a contributor to that reality. A reality where we all love, and appreciate, and dance and sing and truly see what is real.
Who’s with me?