The idea of listening came to me when I spent the last four weeks nurturing a very sore throat. It wasn’t a cold or anything like that. I guess it could have been the fact that I was using my voice for work more than normal. But honestly I believe the issue came from something that was energetically linked to me needing to shut my mouth and listen.
To be perfectly transparent, I had been doing a lot of talking. And I thought that whatever I was saying was important. But I’m not quite sure that everyone else thought it was. And then at one point, I heard myself say, out loud, “I wonder if they are even listening to me.”
And that thought woke me up.
Was I talking just to talk? Was I really listening to what was being offered up? Was I allowing space for Divine to come in and make sense of everything? Was I speaking from my heart? And for goodness sake, what was keeping me from using my voice?
You see, something to remember here that’s pretty important: the throat chakra isn’t just about talking, expressing and getting your voice out there. It’s about listening … really listening. And not just listening to say something in response, but listening from the depth of your heart.
The other thing is that the throat chakra is usually the chakra that gets bottle necked more than most. There’s this mystical theme around the throat chakra that’s pretty interesting. It’s constantly receiving information from the third eye. And well, sometimes the third eye is a bit gray. Additionally, the heart also links into the throat and the information there gets a bit murky for whatever reason as well.
The throat takes on all of this … all of it.
So for those of you who have been telling me to feel better and wondering why I’ve had this sore throat for so long and why in the heck it hasn’t gone away, I’m going to tell you. First, thank you so much for your concern. You needn’t be concerned though. I’ve had some deep healing happening over here and I am grateful!
You see … over the last 12 weeks I decided to dig deep, just like my horoscope, my angels and my intuition told me to do. And you know, when you dig deep, you can’t really change your mind. So in this process I noticed that I was being offered many opportunities to stand up for myself, in a big way. This has always been my work – to stand up for myself, I know it and I laugh now when it still comes up.
But this one was big.
Needless to say, I was asked to stand up for something that rocked me to my core. It brought me back to my own childhood and uprooted ancient fears. And honestly my squeaky voice was that of my inner child who never stood up for herself. Who never spoke up and was now being asked to change ancestral patterns for her children.
It was very surreal and challenging to watch my body take on such old emotions. It was potent to understand what was going on. It was even more powerful to be forced to be silent and listen. The reality was I could not talk. I had to listen.
I had to listen to what was being said.
I listened to what my children were asking.
I listened intently to Spirit.
And in that time, I re-membered how to listen without waiting to respondI re-membered to listen with my heart and not my ego. I re-membered what it felt like to stand up for what I thought to be true and right and just. And I did it from an empowered, graceful, compassionate, no bullshit kind of way.
But I couldn’t have done that in deep truth and freedom if I hadn’t listened for the love. The love took over in all my thoughts, in all my dealings and I had to listen for it because my voice escaped me. There was no room (or voice) to discuss this with anyone else, there was only my thoughts, my heart and my ability to listen.
My voice is still a bit raspy. The tears still come and go honestly. My heart still hurts a bit, but I’ll tell you what. I learned and remembered how powerful listening is. How potent it is to be still and listen to my heart. And how valuable and essential it is to listen to the wisdom of your own intuitive knowledge.